money

Earn More Confidence

Dilemma: You want to look like Bradley Cooper, but you don’t, and never will.  You want to be richer, smarter, leaner, etc.  Therefore, you shy away from taking chances at work, and feel somewhat inadequate with women.  Sound familiar?

The good news is women don’t care as much about looks and money as you think. What they DO care about is confidence.

$20 says he has major swag

$20 says he has major swag

She was already rich...didn't need his money.

She was already rich…didn’t need his money.

Before Brad, there was Billy Bob. Dude has major confidence.

Before Brad, there was Billy Bob. Dude has major confidence.

This model could have any famous guy.  He has what you could have, too...

This model could have any famous guy. He has what you could have, too…

Confidence is a state of mind, and you EARN confidence by making small but significant changes in your life.

Building confidence starts with improving yourself:

Step 1: Do 20 push-ups every morning, immediately after getting out of bed. Then, do 50 sit-ups. Do this DAILY, even if you already workout.

Step 2: Learn something new each day. This can be anything—read the news, watch a documentary, visit a museum, research turtles or penguins or sharks…it doesn’t matter…just learn something!  If you devote half the time you spend on facebook to learning new, interesting things about the world, your knowledge will increase exponentially.

Step 3: Save more money. If you can’t save more money with your current income, get creative with other (legal and ethical) ways to make extra cash outside your main job.  There are all types of ways to make money from home: sell items on craigslist/ebay, work on Amazon mechanical turks, start a successful blog. You can even go old school with a side business—mow lawns on the weekends or even have a lemonade stand:)

Step 4: Become more spiritually active.  Even the most avid atheists can enjoy spiritual peace.  Celebrate whatever higher power you believe in, even if it’s mother earth.  Appreciate the color of the sky, the magnificence of the stars, the wonder of the oceans. Be aware of the world you live in, and be grateful. Your time is limited, after all.

 

Resources I love:

For Fitness and Health:

http://www.crossfit.com/  http://www.mensfitness.com/training/workout-routines  http://thepaleodiet.com/ http://www.fatsickandnearlydead.com/

For Wealth:

http://100startup.com/   http://thesecret.tv/   http://financialmentor.com/wealth-building/how-to-build-wealth/7699  https://www.mturk.com/mturk/welcome  http://www.retailmenot.com

For Peace of Mind and Knowledge:

http://tatfoundation.org/best_spiritual_sites.htm  http://www.lifehack.org/articles/lifestyle/15-steps-to-cultivate-lifelong-learning.html   http://www.arthistory.net/  http://www.davincilife.com/

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Lesson 5: Learn How to F#@king Tip, Part 2

By now, you’ve had adequate time to practice tipping your servers 20%.  And thank GOD.  Now when my friend goes on a date with you, I don’t have to worry about leaving my comfortable chair to pick her up because of your douchey ignorance. Or cheapness. Or both.

But we haven’t beaten Goliath yet, sir douche.  There is still more to learn about who, what, when, where, and why to tip.

Let’s get started.

I would tip every time I see something this cool.  Way to go, baristas! You just earned yourself a tip equal to me ordering a venti nonfat soy double espresso chocolate latte dipped in gold, with sprinkles on top

I would tip every time I see something this cool. Way to go, baristas! You just earned yourself a tip equal to me ordering a venti nonfat soy double espresso chocolate latte dipped in gold, with sprinkles on top

First thing’s first: Why you tip.

Here’s your answer: It doesn’t matter. That’s right. The “why” behind it doesn’t matter.  It’s not chemistry.  It’s not science.  This is not a place to ask “why”.  There is no injustice here, no hidden agenda. Tipping is a part of being a decent human being who shows gratitude for the service provided by another human being.

Yes, I know the key word there is service and my devil’s advocates out there will send me scathing emails about how one should only tip for excellent service, and blah blah blah. Guess what scathing devil’s advocate douches? I AGREE with you.

I AGREE that tipping should be for quality service, but not tipping your valet the standard $3-$5 each way just because you have to wait 1-2 minutes for your car is just cheap.  If you don’t like it, don’t valet.  If there’s no way around it, don’t go to the place with valet only. Just stay home.

And while you’re at it, if you’re not going to tip these people the standard amount, you might as well start loving your douchey couch and work from home, because you have no business not treating the service industry with respect:

Restaurants/Bars:

Waiter: 15% minimum for service, 20% for good service

Bartender: $1-$2 per drink. Remember that water takes just as much effort to serve as opening a beer.

Coatroom attendant: $2 per coat

Valet: $3-$5, and more money can make sure your car is closer to the restaurant. There is still confusion as to WHEN to tip the valet: Do you tip when your car is parked? Delivered? Both? The answer is: Both. $3 minimum each time someone gets in/out of your car. C’mon, Douche.  It’s $6 for someone to take care of your douchey car, that I’m sure you put a cover on at night. Don’t be cheap or rude.

Washroom attendant: These people are super annoying, but you still give them $1-$2

Sommelier: 15% cost of the bottle

...so now, take care of us. Or else.

…so now, take care of us. Or else.

Daily Life:

 Taxi Driver: Varies on location and length of ride. 15% is enough, and an extra $1-$2 for help with bags.  I personally tip extra when the car is clean, smells good, and the driver plays nice music without driving like a maniac.

Food delivery person: 15-20%, with a $5 minimum.

Barber/Hairdresser/Colorist: 15-20% minimum. Other services are at least $2-$3 per service, per provider. It is now acceptable to tip the owner, unless he/she says otherwise. (I tip 20%)

Manicurist: 15-20%

Spa Services: 15-20% (I tip 20%)

Handymen: no tip required, but I try to tip at least $10

Staff at coffee/food places with tip jars: no tip required. Completely optional. I think most people just put extra change in the jar, or a dollar if you pay with debit/credit card.  It’s a buck, you douchebag. Here’s what I do: if it’s a place where I eat regularly, I’ll tip at least $1 each time, because I like the people and I see them often.

Travel:

Skycap at airport: $1-$2 per bag if they check you in outside

Hotel doorman: $1 per bag for help with luggage, $1 per person for help hailing a cab

Hotel Bellhop: $1-$2 per bag ($2 minimum if you just have one bag, but that’s weird, so give him at least $3)

Housekeeper: $2-$5 per night. I’m honestly really bad about remembering to do this 😦

Hotel Concierge: $5 for tickets or reservations, and $10 minimum if they’re really hard to get.  No tip required when you ask for directions.

And those bedsheets? pretty sure I didn't change them.

And those bedsheets? pretty sure I didn’t change them.

 

You don’t have to like it. You don’t have to agree. But don’t be a douche. Just do it.